I suppose before I start this blog post, an introduction is in order. I'm pea's younger brother, not a brother by blood, but close enough. Like her, I am a submissive. Like her, I am a college student. Unlike her, I have a penis. This complicates D/s related matters, as submissive men have a (deserved) negative reputation in the minds of most people. I'm no good at picking writing topics, so I asked pea for one, and here we are at what I would want in a dominant partner. This'll be a treat.
I've often thought of this topic, but never really thought how to best put it to words, so I suppose I'll just have to run down my criteria as they come to mind. I guess this will reflect how important they are to me. Let's start with a fairly simple thing, gender. I am sexually attracted to women more than men. This isn't to say this is a set-in-stone fact, but after thinking about it a bit, I came to the conclusion that I would more likely be more interested in a relationship with a woman.
From an easy topic to a more complex one, one that I will bluntly put for the sake of brevity. I will not submit to anyone less intelligent than myself. This likely comes off as arrogant, because it probably is, but it's the reality of the situation. When I told pea of this, she replied with a statement along the lines of "you'll be alone for the rest of your life", which is wonderful moral support. However, I'm not as smart as she thinks I am, nor am I as smart as I think I am.
What's more, I don't mean "intelligent" in the book-smart sense; quite frankly, I don't care if a partner knows what a quadratic equation is, much less how to solve it. I refer to the word in a more holistic sense. Perhaps the correct word to use would be is wisdom. It is, after all, a complex feeling I have on this matter. I just know that I probably would not submit to someone who doesn't fulfill this Daedalean need that I have in order to submit.
This segues in a way that doesn't segue into the topic of age. This was something else I put a great deal of thought into, and the result was surprisingly narrow minded by me. After thinking on it, I'd much rather be in a relationship with someone around about the same age as myself (23), give or take a few years. I thought this to be somewhat vein, and it is; age should make no difference. But it does. Not in any sexual sense at least, but in terms of relating to a person, I'd much sooner make an emotional connection with someone who grew up with the same things as myself, in the same cultural age as myself.
Does this mean it is impossible for me to ever get into a relationship with someone my elder by a decade or more? Not at all. But I suspect that I would find it easier the closer the person's age is to my own.
Now comes the physical part, in that while pea cares more of matters sensual and psychological, I care more about the physical aspect (which isn't to say that I don't care about other things; just that I also care about bondage and fetishes and stuff.). To be blunt once more, I am horribly perverted person. This would likely be a fairly major sticking point to someone who isn't much into physical stuff as I am, and would likely tank a relationship with such a person.
As for other physical stuff, I have thought about it, and I've discovered that I'm not as nit-picky as I thought I was. At the end of the day, while I do have certain racial preferences, a person I am attracted to (mentally or physically; ideally both) is a person I am attracted to, be they Asian, Caucasian, Latino/a, or Black. In terms of other physical attributes, I've found that I'm not picky. This isn't to say that I do not have things that I find sexy, in either gender, but that's another blog topic for another day.
Oh, that said, I like taller people or shorter people. Not so much people around my average height. It's one of those things that I'm just weird about.
I think that should be enough for a first blog post, so I'll just leave it here for now. Thanks for taking the time to let me exhibit my vain thoughts.
I've often thought of this topic, but never really thought how to best put it to words, so I suppose I'll just have to run down my criteria as they come to mind. I guess this will reflect how important they are to me. Let's start with a fairly simple thing, gender. I am sexually attracted to women more than men. This isn't to say this is a set-in-stone fact, but after thinking about it a bit, I came to the conclusion that I would more likely be more interested in a relationship with a woman.
From an easy topic to a more complex one, one that I will bluntly put for the sake of brevity. I will not submit to anyone less intelligent than myself. This likely comes off as arrogant, because it probably is, but it's the reality of the situation. When I told pea of this, she replied with a statement along the lines of "you'll be alone for the rest of your life", which is wonderful moral support. However, I'm not as smart as she thinks I am, nor am I as smart as I think I am.
What's more, I don't mean "intelligent" in the book-smart sense; quite frankly, I don't care if a partner knows what a quadratic equation is, much less how to solve it. I refer to the word in a more holistic sense. Perhaps the correct word to use would be is wisdom. It is, after all, a complex feeling I have on this matter. I just know that I probably would not submit to someone who doesn't fulfill this Daedalean need that I have in order to submit.
This segues in a way that doesn't segue into the topic of age. This was something else I put a great deal of thought into, and the result was surprisingly narrow minded by me. After thinking on it, I'd much rather be in a relationship with someone around about the same age as myself (23), give or take a few years. I thought this to be somewhat vein, and it is; age should make no difference. But it does. Not in any sexual sense at least, but in terms of relating to a person, I'd much sooner make an emotional connection with someone who grew up with the same things as myself, in the same cultural age as myself.
Does this mean it is impossible for me to ever get into a relationship with someone my elder by a decade or more? Not at all. But I suspect that I would find it easier the closer the person's age is to my own.
Now comes the physical part, in that while pea cares more of matters sensual and psychological, I care more about the physical aspect (which isn't to say that I don't care about other things; just that I also care about bondage and fetishes and stuff.). To be blunt once more, I am horribly perverted person. This would likely be a fairly major sticking point to someone who isn't much into physical stuff as I am, and would likely tank a relationship with such a person.
As for other physical stuff, I have thought about it, and I've discovered that I'm not as nit-picky as I thought I was. At the end of the day, while I do have certain racial preferences, a person I am attracted to (mentally or physically; ideally both) is a person I am attracted to, be they Asian, Caucasian, Latino/a, or Black. In terms of other physical attributes, I've found that I'm not picky. This isn't to say that I do not have things that I find sexy, in either gender, but that's another blog topic for another day.
Oh, that said, I like taller people or shorter people. Not so much people around my average height. It's one of those things that I'm just weird about.
I think that should be enough for a first blog post, so I'll just leave it here for now. Thanks for taking the time to let me exhibit my vain thoughts.
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